If what happens ingame is canon...

Eternal Density · 06-01-2008, 05:32 PM

For kicks, lets see what happens if we take that to extremes by imagining future SG-1 movies.

Sam: Hey Daniel, how's the translation of the tablets from P4F-712 coming along?
Daniel: Not too well. I keep getting interrupted by this guy in funny armor, named IPwnGooolds432, asking me for 'quests'.

Jack: Thor, buddy! We could really use your help fending off the nasty Goa'uld Queen Neferti'teafortwo'tutu.
Thor: I am sorry, O'Neill. All our our ships are busy making FedExtraTerrestrial deliveries. Even our warships, due to the current low price of reverse torsion coil injector socket heads.
Jack: Then how are we supposed to defend ourselves?
Thor: I can offer you a P90 of the Whale for only 20k Naq.

Jack: Security teams to the gateroom!
Walter: Sorry, Sir, the invading alien blobs are in their own instance.

Cam: Can we hack into enemy communications?
Sam: That's impossible, they're using the #Praxis channel.

Obviously only the storylines will become canon, not the game mechanics, but it's fun to play 'what if'

(This is where other people add their own ideas)

Hadyn · 06-01-2008, 05:54 PM

Teal'c: Daniel Jackson, I have a question.

Jackson: Yes, of course Teal'c, what is it?

Teal'c: What does PWNT mean?

Jackson: I don't know, where did you hear it? I won't know without the proper context.

Teal'c: Well a Loyal Jaffa Gank Squad just rolled in and filled Lieutenant Jeffries with 234789236 bullets and one of them shouted "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA PWNT UR FACES PUNX" Then he sat down on top of Jeffries' head and asked him if he cared for any tea?

Jackson: So apparently dead people can drink tea?

Teal'c: Indeed.

Hadyn · 06-01-2008, 06:00 PM

Shepard: McKay!! I NEED YOU TO GET THOSE SYSTEMS ONLINE RIGHT NOW!!"

McKay: Don't worry I work great under pressure....

Shepard: JUST HURRY UP WILL YOU!

McKay:

Shepard: Rodney!! RIGHT NOW!!

McKay:

[ship explodes, everyone respawns]

McKay: Sorry, I'm back had to take a bio-break. Did we win?

Shepard: /facepalm

TelKesh · 06-01-2008, 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eternal Density

Jack: Thor, buddy! We could really use your help fending off the nasty Goa'uld Queen Neferti'teafortwo'tutu.
Thor: I am sorry, O'Neill. All our our ships are busy making FedExtraTerrestrial deliveries. Even our warships, due to the current low price of reverse torsion coil injector socket heads.
Jack: Then how are we supposed to defend ourselves?
Thor: I can offer you a P90 of the Whale for only 20k Naq.

LOL! I am quite unimaginative, but i really look forward to seeing what other people come up with.

but I do picture the scene in Ripple effect with all the Sam's in the room. There was:

Sam Carter
Samcarter
S4mcarter
S4mc4rter
Saamcarter
Sammcarter
Sam Cartar
Carter Sam
ColSam
ColCarter
MajSam
MajCarter
CptSam
CptCarter

Just your usual everyday cloning accident at the Alpha Site

spazyomatex · 06-01-2008, 07:49 PM

O'Neill: "Teal'c! Shoot him already!!"

Teal'c: "I am trying, O'Neill, but he seems to be using some sort of advanced evasion technique I have not seen before. I am having great difficulty targeting him."

O'Neill: "It's called 'bunny-hopping', Teal'c. It's a tactic used by n00bs who don't realize it's not ok to jump around in a gun fight. I'll get on the radio and have the CSR ban him."

Teal'c: "A wise course of action, O'Neill."

O'Neill: "Indeed."

Jayna · 06-01-2008, 08:36 PM

SG1 : All staring in aww, mouth agape staring at the 14 asgard up on the dialing computer in the SGC dancing the same few steps over and over and over again.

Pri3sT of Arecibo · 06-01-2008, 08:44 PM

Scene set up. Jackson is in the hall talking to maintenance about humidity in his room being to high. Down the hall he sees Valla walk out of her room shut the door turn around then open the door and walk back in. in the course of 5 min she has done this 10 times.

Daniel : um ah Valla

Valla: Oh Daniel what a pleasant surprise.

Daniel : I couldn't help but notice you were acting kinda odd.

Valla : Oh was I?

Daniel : Yes you were.

Valla : don't you need to be somewhere important doing important things?

Daniel : I think I am doing something important, now what are you doing?

Valla : Ok I'll tell you but you must promise not to tell or show anyone else.

Daniel : Um Ok, this isn't going to involve bracelets is it?

Valla : Don't be stupid. Ok now follow me and watch closely.

Scene: Valla opens the door, Daniel and her walk into the middle of her room

Daniel : Now what?

Valla : Watch this.

Scene: Valla pulls a handful of dollars out of her pocket and places it on the floor.

Valla : Now Daniel this is the cool part, look in my pocket....

Daniel: I warned you no funny business..

Valla : Oh hush, just look in my pocket and confirm I have no money in it.

Daniel : Ok you don't

Valla : Now follow me

Scene : Valla and Daniel leave the room, once outside Valla closes the door, turns around, opens the door and motions for Daniel to follow her. Once back in the middle of the room she turns to Daniel.

Valla : Do you see the money on the floor?

Daniel : Yes, Valla I do

Valla : Ok watch this

Scene : Valla reaches into her pocket and pulls out what appears to be the exact same handful of dollars that is on the floor.

Valla : Pretty cool uh? I'm going to be so rich..

Daniel : >speechless<

---the end----

I hope most of you got that one.

06-01-2008, 08:56 PM

O'Neill and Carter stand waiting for Daniel in the gate room. The blast doors open, Daniel comes running in, goes right by them, and runs up against the wall and stays there with his feet still moving.

Carter and O'Neill look at each other knowingly, and at the same time say "Must have DCed".

Eternal Density · 06-02-2008, 04:50 PM

[voice="Cam"]Now that's what I'm talkin' about.[/voice]

Scene: SG-1 is standing outside the entrance to a rough looking Lucian facility.
Cam: OK guys, this bunch has given us a lot of trouble in the past. Does anyone need anything from in there, or should we bypass it?
Vala: Yeah, Daniel was after something.
Sam: There's a rare artifact the Lucians stole which he needs to translate to level his archaeology skill.
Vala: Hopefully it'll make those pesky minigames easier for him.
Cam: *sighs* Whatever. Right, I'll take point and deal with the door guards. I'll chuck some grenades to wound and distract the guys on the inside.
Teal'c: There are many guards, ColonelMitchell. I shall scatter them with an intimidating shout. Otherwise you shall be required to fight a large number simultaneously.
Mitchell: Sounds good. Then Vala can sneak up and zat them while they're offguard. Carter can lay down coverfire while Daniel searches for the... artifact. We'll need to get out quickly before reinforcements show up, cos the second wave will be a lot of trouble if we can't take them down quickly. Carter, what odds do you give us.
Sam: Just a second... *scanner beeps* I'm coming up with twenty-seven point six six repeating percentage of survival.
Teal'c: Those odds are improved over those we usually face.
Cam: Great. Guy's are we ready to do this?
Daniel: Alright guys, I'm back. Let's do this! DAANIEEEEEEEL JAAAKSOOOOOONNN!!! *runs into the entrance*
Vala: *stares after him* Oh my Goa'uld, he just ran it! *follows*
Cam: Save him! Hey, stick to the plan! C'mon guys, let's go! Go go go!
*gunfire and zatfire and incoherent yells*
"Stay down!" "My gun's jammed!" "They're all around us!" "Get off the ground, Muscles!"
Daniel: Alright, I got it!
Sam: Stay down, idiot!
Cam: This is utterly ridiculous!
Vala: Muscles is down and we're blocked from the exit.
Daniel: I'm on it! Uh, hi, I'm Daniel, and we're peaceful explorers from...
Sam: Shut up Daniel, you're not helping.
Cam: Medic!
Vala: I'm bleeding. A lot.
Sam: Daniel, they're all dead! Why'd you do such a stupid thing?
Daniel: At least I have chicken.

spazyomatex · 06-02-2008, 05:03 PM

TelKesh · 06-02-2008, 06:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eternal Density

[voice="Cam"]Now that's what I'm talkin' about.[/voice]

Daniel: Alright guys, I'm back. Let's do this! DAANIEEEEEEEL JAAAKSOOOOOONNN!!! *runs into the entrance*

The second you started this thread I was expecting that.

Legendary!

Lady Huntsman · 06-02-2008, 08:59 PM

Massive props to Eternal Density. Your skits are awsome.

Southparker · 06-02-2008, 09:41 PM

I don't get it?

TelKesh · 06-02-2008, 09:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Southparker

I don't get it?

LEEROY JENKINS!

Ames · 06-03-2008, 12:09 AM

All great! And great work on the characterization, guys! I could totally picture it all.

xstriderx · 06-03-2008, 12:55 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TelKesh

LEEROY JENKINS!

That had to be one of the funniest things I've ever seen! Thank you for posting that so I could relate to Eternals post!

HILARIOUS!

MorganSkywalker · 06-03-2008, 01:42 AM

I've heard the references, but never actually seen the video... Thats awesome!

StarStriker · 06-03-2008, 03:53 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Eternal Density

[voice="Cam"]Now that's what I'm talkin' about.[/voice]
DAANIEEEEEEEL JAAAKSOOOOOONNN!!! *runs into the entrance*

fantastic! utterly fantastic lol.

for those that dont understand it, look on youtube for the leeroy jenkins video. Its an old video from an instance run on WoW. highly amusing

Terian1414 · 06-03-2008, 04:13 AM

My friend actually worked with Leroy. Guys name is Dave lol. I'm sure you can find videos of the actual guy.

Anun · 06-03-2008, 06:43 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Terian1414

My friend actually worked with Leroy. Guys name is Dave lol. I'm sure you can find videos of the actual guy.

and there he is the guy in every thread that knows leeroy jenkins in real life.

/adds to list

psycho dude · 06-03-2008, 06:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Anun

and there he is the guy in every thread that knows leeroy jenkins in real life.

/adds to list

You're just jealous that everybody knows leeroy jenkins personally or through a friend and you don't

.

Aszrayel · 06-03-2008, 06:58 AM

Leeroy did have his own website for a while flogging merchandise, but I can't find it anymore

Nabu · 06-03-2008, 07:35 AM

O'Neil: Hey... guys? *waves his hand around the SGC gate room* How many SG teams did we have yesterday?

Carter: 12 I think, sir.

Jackson: Yeeeeah, Jack something is definatly wrong here.

O'Neil: There are 242 SG teams standing outside waiting to use the gate, one team is made up of 5 Asgard, and who the heck let that Goa'uld in here?

Carter: We can't dial out, there has been incoming wormholes for the past 3 hours, I think were stranded sir. Blue Jello anyone?

Teal'c: Indeed.

-Nabu

Anun · 06-03-2008, 07:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by psycho dude

You're just jealous that everybody knows leeroy jenkins personally or through a friend and you don't

.

actually through a similar mechanic to He-Man i am in fact Leeroy Jenkins.

i have the sword of pwnage and when i hold it aloft and cry "BY THE POWER OF JENJKINS" i transform (as if by magic) into a southern sounding raid ruining WoW player.

/truestory

06-03-2008, 09:06 AM

Mitchell: Oh Snap! I so wtfpwned that prior!

Teal'c: I did not know you were a kill stealer Colonel Mitchell.

Mitchell: What do you mean? I tagged him first. lrn2ply noob!

Teal'c: I believe you saw me going in his direction Colonel Mitchell.

Mitchell: So what? You should have fired a shot then. QQ moar nubcakes!

Teal'c: If you persist with this KSing I will be forced to remove you from the group Colonel Mitchell.

Mitchell: Go ahead! I just need 10k more xp to level anyway. Like my Grandma used to say "Tag first, level first".

Teal'c: Well you have just earned a spot on my ignore list Colonel Michell.

Mitchell: Ya? Well you just made it on to my guild's KoS list nubblet.

06-01-2008, 05:32 PM	#1
Eternal Density Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Nonfrozen land of the South	If what happens ingame is canon... For kicks, lets see what happens if we take that to extremes by imagining future SG-1 movies. Sam: Hey Daniel, how's the translation of the tablets from P4F-712 coming along? Daniel: Not too well. I keep getting interrupted by this guy in funny armor, named IPwnGooolds432, asking me for 'quests'. Jack: Thor, buddy! We could really use your help fending off the nasty Goa'uld Queen Neferti'teafortwo'tutu. Thor: I am sorry, O'Neill. All our our ships are busy making FedExtraTerrestrial deliveries. Even our warships, due to the current low price of reverse torsion coil injector socket heads. Jack: Then how are we supposed to defend ourselves? Thor: I can offer you a P90 of the Whale for only 20k Naq. Jack: Security teams to the gateroom! Walter: Sorry, Sir, the invading alien blobs are in their own instance. Cam: Can we hack into enemy communications? Sam: That's impossible, they're using the #Praxis channel. Obviously only the storylines will become canon, not the game mechanics, but it's fun to play 'what if' (This is where other people add their own ideas) __________________ "Yo dawg, I heard you like searching, so I put a search function in your search function so you can search while you find the search function." origin

06-01-2008, 05:54 PM	#2
Hadyn Join Date: May 2008 Location: Uranus	Teal'c: Daniel Jackson, I have a question. Jackson: Yes, of course Teal'c, what is it? Teal'c: What does PWNT mean? Jackson: I don't know, where did you hear it? I won't know without the proper context. Teal'c: Well a Loyal Jaffa Gank Squad just rolled in and filled Lieutenant Jeffries with 234789236 bullets and one of them shouted "HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA PWNT UR FACES PUNX" Then he sat down on top of Jeffries' head and asked him if he cared for any tea? Jackson: So apparently dead people can drink tea? Teal'c: Indeed. __________________ superdave4077

06-01-2008, 06:00 PM	#3
Hadyn Join Date: May 2008 Location: Uranus	Shepard: McKay!! I NEED YOU TO GET THOSE SYSTEMS ONLINE RIGHT NOW!!" McKay: Don't worry I work great under pressure.... Shepard: JUST HURRY UP WILL YOU! McKay: Shepard: Rodney!! RIGHT NOW!! McKay: [ship explodes, everyone respawns] McKay: Sorry, I'm back had to take a bio-break. Did we win? Shepard: /facepalm __________________ superdave4077

06-01-2008, 07:49 PM	#5
spazyomatex Join Date: Jan 2008	O'Neill: "Teal'c! Shoot him already!!" Teal'c: "I am trying, O'Neill, but he seems to be using some sort of advanced evasion technique I have not seen before. I am having great difficulty targeting him." O'Neill: "It's called 'bunny-hopping', Teal'c. It's a tactic used by n00bs who don't realize it's not ok to jump around in a gun fight. I'll get on the radio and have the CSR ban him." Teal'c: "A wise course of action, O'Neill." O'Neill: "Indeed." __________________ I don't insult people, I sarcastically praise them.

06-01-2008, 08:36 PM	#6
Jayna Join Date: Apr 2006 Location: P3X-888	SG1 : All staring in aww, mouth agape staring at the 14 asgard up on the dialing computer in the SGC dancing the same few steps over and over and over again. __________________ Just say NO to the Warcraft static storyline and YES to the Asheron's Call model where things change, end and progress.

06-01-2008, 08:44 PM	#7
Pri3sT of Arecibo Join Date: May 2008 Location: Colorado Springs (15min from Cheyenne Mountain)	Scene set up. Jackson is in the hall talking to maintenance about humidity in his room being to high. Down the hall he sees Valla walk out of her room shut the door turn around then open the door and walk back in. in the course of 5 min she has done this 10 times. Daniel : um ah Valla Valla: Oh Daniel what a pleasant surprise. Daniel : I couldn't help but notice you were acting kinda odd. Valla : Oh was I? Daniel : Yes you were. Valla : don't you need to be somewhere important doing important things? Daniel : I think I am doing something important, now what are you doing? Valla : Ok I'll tell you but you must promise not to tell or show anyone else. Daniel : Um Ok, this isn't going to involve bracelets is it? Valla : Don't be stupid. Ok now follow me and watch closely. Scene: Valla opens the door, Daniel and her walk into the middle of her room Daniel : Now what? Valla : Watch this. Scene: Valla pulls a handful of dollars out of her pocket and places it on the floor. Valla : Now Daniel this is the cool part, look in my pocket.... Daniel: I warned you no funny business.. Valla : Oh hush, just look in my pocket and confirm I have no money in it. Daniel : Ok you don't Valla : Now follow me Scene : Valla and Daniel leave the room, once outside Valla closes the door, turns around, opens the door and motions for Daniel to follow her. Once back in the middle of the room she turns to Daniel. Valla : Do you see the money on the floor? Daniel : Yes, Valla I do Valla : Ok watch this Scene : Valla reaches into her pocket and pulls out what appears to be the exact same handful of dollars that is on the floor. Valla : Pretty cool uh? I'm going to be so rich.. Daniel : >speechless< ---the end---- I hope most of you got that one. __________________ The Streets Will Flow With The Blood Of The Unbelievers

06-01-2008, 08:56 PM	#8
The Blakey	O'Neill and Carter stand waiting for Daniel in the gate room. The blast doors open, Daniel comes running in, goes right by them, and runs up against the wall and stays there with his feet still moving. Carter and O'Neill look at each other knowingly, and at the same time say "Must have DCed".

06-02-2008, 04:50 PM	#9
Eternal Density Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Nonfrozen land of the South	[voice="Cam"]Now that's what I'm talkin' about.[/voice] Scene: SG-1 is standing outside the entrance to a rough looking Lucian facility. Cam: OK guys, this bunch has given us a lot of trouble in the past. Does anyone need anything from in there, or should we bypass it? Vala: Yeah, Daniel was after something. Sam: There's a rare artifact the Lucians stole which he needs to translate to level his archaeology skill. Vala: Hopefully it'll make those pesky minigames easier for him. Cam: sighs Whatever. Right, I'll take point and deal with the door guards. I'll chuck some grenades to wound and distract the guys on the inside. Teal'c: There are many guards, ColonelMitchell. I shall scatter them with an intimidating shout. Otherwise you shall be required to fight a large number simultaneously. Mitchell: Sounds good. Then Vala can sneak up and zat them while they're offguard. Carter can lay down coverfire while Daniel searches for the... artifact. We'll need to get out quickly before reinforcements show up, cos the second wave will be a lot of trouble if we can't take them down quickly. Carter, what odds do you give us. Sam: Just a second... scanner beeps I'm coming up with twenty-seven point six six repeating percentage of survival. Teal'c: Those odds are improved over those we usually face. Cam: Great. Guy's are we ready to do this? Daniel: Alright guys, I'm back. Let's do this! DAANIEEEEEEEL JAAAKSOOOOOONNN!!! runs into the entrance Vala: stares after him Oh my Goa'uld, he just ran it! follows Cam: Save him! Hey, stick to the plan! C'mon guys, let's go! Go go go! gunfire and zatfire and incoherent yells "Stay down!" "My gun's jammed!" "They're all around us!" "Get off the ground, Muscles!" Daniel: Alright, I got it! Sam: Stay down, idiot! Cam: This is utterly ridiculous! Vala: Muscles is down and we're blocked from the exit. Daniel: I'm on it! Uh, hi, I'm Daniel, and we're peaceful explorers from... Sam: Shut up Daniel, you're not helping. Cam: Medic! Vala: I'm bleeding. A lot. Sam: Daniel, they're all dead! Why'd you do such a stupid thing? Daniel: At least I have chicken. __________________ "Yo dawg, I heard you like searching, so I put a search function in your search function so you can search while you find the search function." origin

06-02-2008, 05:03 PM	#10
spazyomatex Join Date: Jan 2008	__________________ I don't insult people, I sarcastically praise them.

06-02-2008, 08:59 PM	#12
Lady Huntsman Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: The Castle	Props Massive props to Eternal Density. Your skits are awsome. __________________

06-02-2008, 09:41 PM	#13
Southparker Join Date: Jun 2008	I don't get it?

06-03-2008, 12:09 AM	#15
Ames Join Date: Mar 2008 Location: Canada	All great! And great work on the characterization, guys! I could totally picture it all. __________________

06-03-2008, 01:42 AM	#17
MorganSkywalker Join Date: Feb 2006 Location: CA, USA	I've heard the references, but never actually seen the video... Thats awesome! __________________ Proud member of the Stargate Gaming Clan - Scaring away snakeheads since 2005.

06-03-2008, 04:13 AM	#19
Terian1414 Join Date: Feb 2008	My friend actually worked with Leroy. Guys name is Dave lol. I'm sure you can find videos of the actual guy.

06-03-2008, 06:58 AM	#22
Aszrayel Command Leader of [SGUK-1] / QA Tester Join Date: May 2007 Location: Manchester, UK	Leeroy did have his own website for a while flogging merchandise, but I can't find it anymore __________________ Command Forum, Website, SGW wiki Checkout: http://www.sggaminginfo.com/

06-03-2008, 07:35 AM	#23
Nabu Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: Borsippa	O'Neil: Hey... guys? waves his hand around the SGC gate room How many SG teams did we have yesterday? Carter: 12 I think, sir. Jackson: Yeeeeah, Jack something is definatly wrong here. O'Neil: There are 242 SG teams standing outside waiting to use the gate, one team is made up of 5 Asgard, and who the heck let that Goa'uld in here? Carter: We can't dial out, there has been incoming wormholes for the past 3 hours, I think were stranded sir. Blue Jello anyone? Teal'c: Indeed. -Nabu __________________ -I am like a mosquito in a nudist camp. I know what I ought to do, but I don't know where to begin.

06-03-2008, 09:06 AM	#25
The Blakey	Mitchell: Oh Snap! I so wtfpwned that prior! Teal'c: I did not know you were a kill stealer Colonel Mitchell. Mitchell: What do you mean? I tagged him first. lrn2ply noob! Teal'c: I believe you saw me going in his direction Colonel Mitchell. Mitchell: So what? You should have fired a shot then. QQ moar nubcakes! Teal'c: If you persist with this KSing I will be forced to remove you from the group Colonel Mitchell. Mitchell: Go ahead! I just need 10k more xp to level anyway. Like my Grandma used to say "Tag first, level first". Teal'c: Well you have just earned a spot on my ignore list Colonel Michell. Mitchell: Ya? Well you just made it on to my guild's KoS list nubblet.

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